life is like a wheel, too
soooo it's been a year since everyone close to me graduated and i was left behind. totally my fault. anyway, it was nice seeing some of them earlier today. although kanina ko lang narealize na andami ko na palang hindi alam tungkol sa mga tao. a year changes people. at least they change SOME people.

for some of us, though things happen, things don't really change. sometimes in your desire to move forward, you don't see that the path you're on isn't really linear at all. in a more perfect world, all of our roads would be anth's skyway. a straight line, well maintained. where it's easy to keep track of where you've been, and where you're going. where life seems full of possibilities and there's just no end to that stretch.

but the world isn't perfect, now is it? some roads go around in circles. and worse yet, most of those roads aren't the kind where you see the turn coming. those roads have subtle curves and unchanging scenery, so you can't really tell if you've been there before or not. sometimes, you can only learn in retrospect. sometimes, you really don't learn that much at all.

so its confusing. but it's comforting to know that amidst the confusion, you're not really alone. there are some people out there just as confused as you are. you know what i mean, those people who make driving more than a way of getting from point a to point b. those people who make you not mind going around in circles as long as they're in for the ride.

so, what happens next? can't really say.

i remember before when i kept telling people that my motto in life was no regrets. that no matter what happens, learn from your mistakes, and never regret anything. well, i'm taking that back.

maybe i'm more jaded and cynical now. or maybe i've just gotten a teeny bit wiser after all this time. i don't know. what i DO know is i truly believe right now that life really isn't life at all unless you have decisions you truly regret making. sabi ng counting crows "if you've never stared off into the distance, then your life is a shame".

today i stared more than i have in a long time.

sure beats playing video games.